A few lessons ago, I noted contrasting opinions between myself, and the apostle Paul, where he mentioned, “For I would that all men were even as I myself. But every man has his proper gift of God, one after this manner, and another after that” (1 Corinthians 7:7). Paul’s reasoning behind his desire that all be single, wasn’t based on selfishness, but so that men and women could focus all of their attention on God, as he did, without balancing the challenges and concerns involved with marriage as well. Marriage is a beautiful thing, but can become a distraction when the husband and wife are unable to maintain a godly focus. God instituted marriage, and it should be carried out the way He designed it, and I strongly believe that everyone should desire to experience it, but only for the right reasons.
When God took one of the ribs from Adam, and skillfully formed the woman, He made certain to take her from his side, so that she could be equal with him, from under his arm, to be protected by him, and from near his heart, so that she could be loved by him. Knowing this, the woman should never feel that she’s beneath the man, nor regard herself as inferior, but should carry herself as the “help” God created to “meet” the needs of her husband.
Establishing a solid foundation, and working together, are two key elements required to make a marriage work. One reason I’ve learned why many marriages fail is, the foundations were built on feelings and emotions, rather than planning and logical reasoning. When a man makes up in his mind that he’s prepared to marry a woman, he should first have a job. What woman in her right mind would give up all her single liberties to a man who is unable to support her? In my most humble opinion, that’s borderline insanity! It’s obvious that God should be at the forefront of a woman’s desires in a man, but having consistent income is far more attractive than biceps and a six-pack.
In the beginning of any relationship, the courting process is super important. Adam and Eve were an exception, as they were the only two humans in existence, and I’m convinced Adam was created with unlimited knowledge, based on his reference to a man leaving his father and mother. If Eve and himself were the only humans created, then how could Adam possibly have any understanding of family, except it had already been embedded in his system? That’s information for another lesson. In any case, having knowledge and reverence for God will help in choosing a wife suitable to the man. After God made Adam, He immediately put Him to work, then taught him the Word. The man seeking a wife should follow this example, by studying and meditating on the Word of God, and being in a position to financially support a wife. According to Scripture, the man is responsible for teaching the Word of God to his wife. No, I didn’t stutter. Rarely do men follow this example, as we see more women doing the teaching these days, but God’s order was designed where men are to teach the Word in their homes.
Can you see how out of order this world has become? Roles have been reversed, and families are dysfunctional, but all could be avoided if God’s order is implemented in every marriage. As you prepare your mind, heart, and social position to be a husband or wife, don’t forget to check what God expects from you as well. Marriage indeed is a beautiful institution, and I pray yours gains God’s favor from now, until eternity!
Walk in love,